Since becoming a parent, I have taken more of a notice of the news, blogs, friends' accounts of things and I have a dream.
I read a blog where one woman lost her baby to SIDS. I just found out that my husband's aunt lost her baby at 10 months old. Watching the news, there are accounts of children dying everyday. A couple I knew in High School just spend too long in Primary Children's Hospital dealing with their daughter who had a brain tumor and there were moments where they weren't sure she'd make it. I read another blog where his daughter was born with a birth defect and wasn't expected to live and, against all odds, is now home and they are just biding their time before she leaves them.
Every day, I hear about a loss that every parent dreads. And I wonder how the nameless, faceless families pay for this.
Matt commented that before people moved across the state, country, or world to live, there were better support systems. Now, there just isn't that support system for a lot of families.
I want to start a foundation called "Angels Returned".
There are so many tragedies that families get bank accounts set up for them. The community really helps out either because it is such a heinous event or because they are more well known in their community. Which is so great for those families. But what about the ones whose children are dying from sicknesses? Whose SIDS babies aren't mentioned in the news? The families don't go to church?
I can't even imagine having to deal with losing my child and then having to pay for a funeral. There are always so many medical expenses accrued. Regardless of how the child died, they end up in the hospital. Or maybe they've been in the hospital for a while. No matter how a child dies, I want to start a foundation to pay for the final expenses of a funeral.
My dream would allow all hospitals to give families the number so we could pay for the funeral of all children 18 and younger. No matter the reason, be it suicide, cancer, accident of any kind, SIDS, still births, birth defects, tragedy of any kind. Just because a family knows a child may die from a birth defect or sickness and they have a little more time to deal with the grieving process doesn't make it any easier than those who suddenly lose a child. Not that I know, but I can only think a child lost is a child lost.
I have no idea how to start something like this. I am pretty sure that this thought is WAY over my head.
This is the stuff that runs through my head at night and why I can't sleep. Why does one child's tragedy and untimely death deem more importance than another? Just because the family are immigrants the child isn't as important? Because it was from "natural" causes it's not as important and the family doesn't need the help?
I know from watching my husband's grandparents burying their child who was in her 50's, that no matter the age of the child, to bury your child is unnatural and is devastating. Who needs to add the cost of a funeral and planning the danged thing to the mix?
So...I have a dream. I'd like to try to make those last decisions that some families have to make a lot less difficult. Take away the money issues. Let them know that it is taken care of. Be together with the rest of you family and love them. I want to ease the pain of the survivors of child death.