The definition of me today.

Main Entry:	idiot
Part of Speech:	noun
Definition:	very stupid person
Synonyms:	blockhead, bonehead, cretin, dimwit, dork,dumbbell, dunce, fool, ignoramus, imbecile, jerk,kook, moron, muttonhead, nincompoop, ninny,nitwit, out to lunch, pinhead, simpleton, stupid,tomfool, twit
Notes:	an idiot  is a stupid person with a mental agebelow three years, while a moron  is a stupidperson with a mental age of between seven totwelve years

I am not sure after reading this definition if I am actually an idiot or merely a moron... but the fact still stands. Sometimes I am a very stupid person. 


Those of you who know me are probably nodding in agreement... or at least saying to yourself, "Why yes, sometimes you are." Those of you who don't know me so well, are probably thinking that no, I am not an idiot. But that's like saying I don't have freckles. Which I do.


So, we are getting off of a week long stint of sickness at my house. I don't get sick very often. And when I get sick, it's usually just a yucky bug for a day or so and I move on. Matt gets what I've had and he's down for the count. Literally down and dying. 


Linus had been sick with some sort of stomach bug for a couple days and it's been a stinky week for me at home. We started him on Pedialyte stuff to keep him hydrated. Both ends exploding is a messy stinky business. Just as I was ready to call the doctor, he got better. So...I thought, Hey, cool. No doctor visit with two kids to take them in and get one of them sick with something else. 


Sunday evening, I wasn't feeling so hot and made the off handed comment that maybe Matt should stay at home with me so that I could sleep off this bug I think I'm getting. Just to help me out a little for the one time I'm sick in a year and he had the nerve to come down with a more extreme case of exploding ends. And let me just say, he doesn't vomit quietly. *shiver with a hint of gag* 


Sigh. So much for me getting a little rest while I am feeling under the weather. For me, this whole episode consisted of a mild fever, a small episode of upset tummy/diarrhea, and nausea. The aches though. Those were the worse. My neck hurt. My knees hurt. My hips hurt. My back hurt. My head... I don't even know a word in the English language to explain. My. Body. Hurt. (Can you hear the whine in that? I hope so.)


So, I have one muy sick husband. One very healthy toddler. One very healthy creeper baby. And one sick me. We ended up taking turns sleeping and watching the kids which was great. I managed to get in enough sleep that today I actually feel pretty ok. Matt is still having some yucky tummy issues, but I am not sure how much of that is this sickness and how much is his stomach thing he's been dealing with for a year now. 


I figure that both kids are probably pretty stir crazy and I decided to take them out for a stroll. I had some packages to mail and I figured that since I am still in a place in my jean size that I am not happy I'd do something about it. Let's go for a walk to the UPS store kids!! It's just a quick 1.3 mile jaunt down a treacherous hill with crappy sidewalks. No biggie. And really, the way to the UPS store wasn't a big deal. It was very nice and pleasant. 


The way home... well, I guess I forgot that it wasn't downhill both ways. 


If you haven't seen the street I live on, it's kinda pretty much like walking around San Fransisco starting at Embarcadero Street. You can only go up. Or down I guess into the water. But it's not like a slight incline really. It's more like pushing a stroller up the stairs of the Empire State Building. I haven't walked more than a block in a long time. I'm so out of shape. 


We got home, thanks to Linus insisting on helping me push the stroller home. I would have definitely pushed myself to and past my limit of my stamina trying to get home as fast as I can. 
Burn those calories!! 
Burn that fat!! 
Build those muscles!!


Ya, remember we were sick for 4 days? 


I just wanted to repeat that I am an idiot. Way to push myself back to sick. 


I've decided that I didn't get sick like Matt and Linus. I got what celebrities call "exhaustion". I just don't have the luxury of going to the hospital, getting and IV, some good drugs, and sleeping it off. So I am working at staying in this exhausted/migrainy state of being that so far has left me not vomiting yet. YES!! *fist pump*


By the by, before I sign off on this post, I SO have to pimp out my shoes. I bought a pair of Tom's shoes. I have been wanting a pair. Been looking at buying a pair for two years now. Talked to a girl wearing a pair and asked if she liked them. She said she'll never buy another brand of shoes ever again. I finally bought a pair. I will never buy another brand of shoes again (other than my high heels cause they make me feel pretty). After walking that ridiculous walk, my feet don't hurt. My feet aren't swollen, achy, ugh feet that usually happen when I walk too far. I can stand all day at home walking around, cleaning, working and feel FABULOUS!! I love, love, love these shoes. 


Plus they donate a pair of shoes for every pair you buy. Bonus on the good vibes. 


Yup, definitely upgraded myself to moron. I at least wore sensible shoes this time. 

How...

does Linus come up with these things?

Most mornings, Linus wakes up around the same time that Matt wakes up to get ready for work. They usually kind of hang out a little, which I love cause #1 I get to sleep a little and #2 they get some daddy/son time. 

Matt turns on the TV to qubo before he leaves in the morning and so Linus is free to kind of run around our bedroom while I work on waking my sorry self up. 

Usually Linus wakes me up by poking me in the eye. Or poking his cup into my face. Or pushing a banana into my face. One day he did get his face as close to mine as he could till I woke up. He squealed then smacked me. Good Morning!

So, this morning, I woke up to Linus licking my cheek. Following the lick with "mmmm-num". 

???

Who knew I tasted so good in the morning?!? 

Unfortunately, he has started licking my arms, legs, feet, face, belly. Any chance he gets. 

Today, while getting ready to get in the shower, he licked my bum. 

I have a feeling for my own comfort we will no longer have co-ed showers in my house. He's not quite two, but it was too weird for even me. 

My fatty boombalattie

There was a little girl

Who had a little curl

Right in the middle of her forehead

When she was good

She was very very good

But when she was bad 

She was HORRID

This is my little girl with all of her little curls and it makes me afraid that she has some of that poem in her. She is very very good a lot... but oh, I am afraid of the horrid.

My little baby girl is almost always a constant source of joy to me. From the top of her crazy hair down to her long crazy toes, she makes me smile. Her smile is not just a smile with her mouth. Her whole face lights up. She has to use her eyes, her mouth, her hair line moves. Her giggle is like tinkling bells. When she gets excited, her whole body lets me know. She kicks her feet, her arms shake, she sounds like she's hyperventalating.

She is finally sleeping on her own. All night long. Let me repeat. ALL. NIGHT. LONG. Not that I do, but that's a different story. She wakes up at 4am to eat and then cuddle and sleeps with me until 8 or until Linus wakes us up. I am not one for co-sleeping because I don't sleep well. Bea smells so good to me that I don't mind having her cuddled right up to me for a couple of hours. I love to smell her head, her blanket, her car seat...unless there was a spit up. When she sleeps with us, it's cute. She has to cuddle and she doesn't even care who it is, so she rolls from Matt to me. When she reaches one of us, she'll *wigglewigglewiggle* till she gets herself tucked in as close as she can.

Little B loves her brother. Just looking at him makes her smile and giggle. She watches him and studies him and prefers him over most anybody else. He doesn't so much like her anymore. She is getting mobile and wants to play with him. He doesn't want to share. He has even started the "Don't touch me" thing.

On one hand I love that she's such a momma's girl, but it is difficult when I need to do something and someone else holds her and she starts to scream because I stepped away.

I love that she looks like she is half asleep almost all of the time and that she smiles so easily. I love her deep belly laugh and I can't help laughing with her when she does it.

I do not love her scream, but that is because my ears don't love it. Thankfully she doesn't do that too very often. Mostly when she is in need of one of the three necessities. Diaper change, food, or sleep.

I love that I feel that I have always known her. She seems an old soul to me. I love that in bonding with her, I have bonded better with my son. I love that she and Linus have really made Matt and I closer and more tightly bonded. It truly feels that we are a family.

I would never have thought in a million gazillion years that having a little girl would have made me this happy, this content, so full of peace. I know I say this now and that I do have the little princess stage, the know it all stage, the teenage angst and drama to look forward to. Maybe she will be more like me and not be so much a princess, too much of a know it all, and peacefully on the outside slide into teenage years. Maybe she'll be like my little sister. Too much princess, some know it all, very much drama into teenage years only to calm down once she had a baby near the end of her teenage life.

My favorite part of Bea and Matthew was their very first meeting. The look on his face when he saw her for the very first time... I have no words. It was beautiful.

This is my favorite baby picture or hers. She smiles at her daddy.

We had some rough early day pictures. She was not very photogenic. She had stoner face or her tongue was hanging out. But as my dad said, I'm glad she's grown into her face.

This is her "Superman Pick Me UP" pose. I did finally get a picture of her cute crooked smile though.

I know the whole color stuff is out of control in this pic and it hurts my eyes, but she sure is cute in that hat!

Linus and Bea in their gbums. They are the same size diaper. I sure hope she doesn't pass him up size wise...

This is Bea gazing lovingly at Matt's cousin Brian. Poor guy has nothing but sisters. He is AMAZING with kids.

My cutie patootie with her pigtails in...

The reason we put pigtails in her hair in the first place.

I CAN NOT get a picture of her smiling without it being blurry. She can't smile and hold still. Like I said, she smiles with her whole body.

The cutest picture I have of her with Grandpa Bailey. Oh, her smile melts me. Makes me smile even when I can't bear to bring one up. She melts Grandma Bailey's heart. She has her daddy wrapped around his finger already. I am afraid.

She makes me want another one.

Fly on the wall...

So here is a conversation that the fly on the wall heard the other day...

Matt: So..... I may have accidentally won an auction on ebay.
Me: Accidentally? What did you win? You've been shopping for eggs again?!?!
Matt: Silkie chicken eggs. ButIdidn'tmeantoIwasuplateandtheauctiondidn'tcloseforafewdayssoIputabidon. (spoken very fast translated to "But I didn't mean to. I was up late and the auction didn't close for a few days, so I put a bid on")
Me: *sigh + eye roll* How many?
Matt: 60
Me: WHAT?!?!? WTF are we going to do with 60 chickens?!?!
Matt: *giggling* just kidding. Only 15. Come look and see what I bought.

So we go and look online and...
Matt: Oh. It looks like I accidentally won another auction. Oops!

So, we received our silkie eggs in the mail today and should be receiving 6 red-golden pheasant eggs in the mail any day. Plus, our quail will be hatching the 20th-ish.

What have I gotten myself into!?

Hit in the head

I'm pretty sure that it is human nature to have a kind of knee jerk reaction to pain.

It's hot, pull back.
It pokes, pull it out. Isn't that how Steve Irwin died?
It squishes, pull away.
etc.

Of course, I'm only talking about physical pain. Emotional pain is a different story. Time and time again, we are hurting and we stay in the situation and even delve in further and make it worse.

So, Linus is getting tall enough that he can easily get into the kitchen drawers. He has been for a little while though, but has avoided the sharp drawer due to Mom and Dad's reaction to him trying to get it. So, we have managed to avoid any Linus/knife catastrophes to date.

Today, while bent over the coffee table trying to scrape off toddler crack that goes by the name of Gogurt, Linus hauled off and baseball swung our knife sharpener and hit me right on the bridge of my nose.

My immediate reaction was to throw whatever caused that body tingling, stars above my head, cuckoo sounding, sick down to my toes pain across the room.

I had a nanosecond to mentally override the instinctive knee jerk reaction to avoid the pain and preserve the life of my offspring. I am proud to say I succeeded.

In retrospect, in my nauseous state, am very glad it was the knife sharpener and not one of our knives that kit my nose. I am also very glad it was my nose and not Bea's head.

Child locks are being placed now as I type.

Now, I will go lay down and hope that he didn't break off a sharp piece of nasal bone that will slowly travel to my brain and kill me.  ;)

Expletive

Every once in a while, I have days where there is more going on than there is Amanda to go around. Yesterday was one of those days. There was the Race for the Cure, the Green Celebration in Library Square, an old friend of mine was having her baby shower in Brigham, I had some makeup I needed to drop off to another friend in Brigham, I'd promised my dad I'd come up to help him plant trees. So, I had to skip some and do others. I chose to go to Brigham.

I also found a babysitter for my kids and bought tickets to the 30 Seconds To Mars concert that evening and planned on meeting friends and having dinner before hand. All in all, a very overpacked day. I need to put this preamble in to explain that I started the day off with WAY too much to do, WAY too excited about the concert, so there was a little bit of anxiety and panic going on.

I woke up 2 hours later than I intended Saturday. I meant to run to Brigham early so I could help my dad, run my errands, then come back, be ready and be at dinner on time. Not only did I wake up late, it took me 2 hours to try to get me and the kids ready. I was having a numb brain day and just wasn't very efficient.

I made it to the baby shower late, stayed too long because I haven't seen Darla in quite a while, so I felt I should visit. I made it to my makeup drop off on time, but of course, I stayed too long. I like Karianne and this is the first time I have met her husband and kids. I sat in my car afterwards, not able to find my keys... darn my over busy brain!!

I showed up to help my dad and did as much as I could, but I didn't get near enough done that I would have liked. I needed at least 5 more hours. Which I would have had if I didn't plan on this concert. I did end up leaving Brigham a half hour later than I intended, so I felt very rushed.

I got home, got ready very quick, and as much as I love my darling husband, I don't think he understands time. He lives very much on his own clock. He came in a little after I did, started to do the dishes, and moved at a turtle's pace. By now I am almost in full panic mode. I was supposed to meet my friends for dinner at 4:00. It is now 4:45 and we are just barely leaving the house.... I know I need to relax, but I woke up running late... hard to get out of the rushing, panicky mode.

We got to the Gateway and ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! Oh ya, there was a playoff Jazz game. Sigh. Now to find parking somewhere in a 5 mile radius. Not to mention I am wearing heels cause they make me feel pretty. So, we find a parking spot, and start hiking to Happy Sumo. Me carrying Linus. Matt carrying Bea. I'm still in heels.

We start eating, and we aren't all that late for the food to arrive. But Linus started weazing a little, so I gave him a shot of Albuterol. And he turned into a public terror.

Bethany showed up not too long into us eating and we ran out to hand the kids over. I over assume things sometimes, assumed that she'd have a kid's seat for Mikayla because she will be 3 in my mind for a long time, and she's too old for a carseat. Bah! I hoof it to our car 2 blocks away to grab Linus's carseat, grab it, and hoof it back. In NBA season playoff traffic...and heels. And, to make matters even better, the sushi decides that it doesn't want to sit well...AHHHH!

I'm rushing not only to get back to Bethany and to my friends who are still sitting at Happy Sumo, but there may be an accident if I don't get to a restroom NOW!! And did I mention I'm wearing heels. Brand new high heels. And my feet are starting to burn?

10 minutes later, my guts feel better, and 4 of us are standing around planning where to meet, park, etc. for the show. And we take off. Again. I think my feet are bleeding at this point.

We pay for parking, head out to the Rail Event Center... and I'm not really sure what Matt is looking at, but at a stop light, after we had already stopped, his foot slipped off the brake pedal and he rear ended the car in front of us. All I can think, "Can this day get any worse?"

The answer to that is Yes. It can. And it did.

The guy got out of his car, looked at his car, no damage, so he got back in and drove away. Whew. We paid to park for the show, got out, and. the. tickets. are. gone. GONE!! MY FREAKING TICKETS FELL OUT OF MY POCKET!! I looked in the car, I called the sushi place, we went back and looked a little. Gone.

I am so disappointed at this point. I love concerts and this is the first one Matt and I were going to go to since Linus was born. I was so excited. It's hard to find a sitter on Saturday night, have a little extra money for a frivolity, and actually get to go. I rushed all day, anticipated all day, was a bad dinner companion to my friends, and then I have no tickets to get in. I just wanted to cry.

Matt thought maybe we could see a movie and at this point, I didn't want to spend any more money than I already had. I just wanted to go to Bethany's house, pick up the kids, and go home.

The disappointmet was trying to ooze out of my eyes. Almost made it too.

We got to Bethany's house and it turns out, she's having a crisis. Tory is sick, in the ER, and she needed someone to watch not only her baby, but my babies so she could go to the hospital. We showed up, took the kids, and she was able to focus on Tory. How weird is that?

I have an old friend who always said, "God loves a coincedence." It keeps you remembering that there is a higher power out there.

 I felt a little better about the whole evening. The dissapointment was still there. Still is. At least it stopped trying to ooze out of my eyes. I hate crying.

She's not mine...

Bea has been eating slimy baby food for about 2 months now. We tried her at 4 months like our pediatrician recommended and she just wasn't interested. So, I gave her a break and started back at about 5, maybe 5 1/2 months.

She LOVES to eat. I literally hear her saying *nom nom nom* as she's eating. She cries because I have to take the time to scoop up another giant, heaping baby spoon of slimy food.

She loves her cereals and would probably eat an entire box of it if I let her. She loves her vegetables. She'll demolish a jar of green beans in 10 seconds. She won't eat her fruits...

Wait...WHAT?!?!

She is obviously not my baby nor Matt's baby.

I think I spent a 3 month period eating nothing but brownies, butterfingers, and Code Red Mountain Dew. I would rather live off fruit and doughnuts and wash it down with Coke than eat anything else. Matt is the biggest chocolate fiend I've ever met. If there is anything with sugar in the house, fruit or otherwise, it is gone pretty quick. Linus lives off of yogurt. He gets a whiff that there is chocolate and there is no end to the whining that ensues until he gets it. Green beans make Linus gag. Peas make Linus gag. He will NOT eat potatoes.

Where did this little girl come from? Strawberries make her gag. She won't eat peaches. She will barely tolerate bananas.

Did you get that? STRAWBERRIES MAKE HER GAG!!


She isn't my baby.

um...*knockknockknock*...hello... Universe??

So, I am going to leave everyone who reads this with some sense of confusion and I will not be able to quell said confusion until sometime next week. Or maybe even in a month. I don't even know.

All I know is, I am concerned. I am worried about the health of a family member. I know what my overactive imagination is telling me and I am somewhat worried it is that "still, small voice" everyone talks about. I am worried that life is about to get really hard.

Or, it could be nothing and a simple pill everyday will suffice.

So, please keep my family in your thoughts, and send some good vibes our way. Prayers are welcomed for those who pray.

Thank you. :)

Overkill

Ok, so, to make it easier for me and others to remember my blog website, I have changed the name. I am sending all of my old posts over to the new one. I don't know who all reads this, so I will get the word out as many places as I can. The new one is
http://beasandroses.blogspot.com/

I just thought it was cute what with Bea (bee...buzz) and my middle name Rose. Anyway, a little Bailey girl power over here. And I am the only one who writes here so there. :P

I will probably post here that I have a new posting there for a while until the word gets around to my few readers. Thanks!!

Mystery Pez

The longest day in a while was when Linus went into the hospital with his asthma attack. I had around 2 hours of sleep that night and went into the ER at 4 am and there was no rest for mom that day. Matt can sleep almost anywhere, and he volunteered to sleep in the hospital with Linus while I went home to sleep in my bed to recharge for the next day. I came home to my beautiful Bea, my dogs, and my mom watching them. And a package that had come in the mail for me. I was a little nervous to open it because it was only addressed to my first name, I had no idea who it was from, and in my exhausted state, I could not control my sometimes raging imagination.

Instead of it being a bomb or an anthrax filled letter (yes, in my mind I am that important.) I received this...

So, this X-wing pilot from Star Wars Pez dispenser was so far off in left field, I was left speechless. 

Then I checked it for candy.

So, when we got home from the hospital, finally, the next day late in the evening, I was as surprised, if not more so, to find another package addressed to me. 

Opening it, I found two Pez dispensers. Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck. And these two are OLD. How freaking cool! 

Wait a minute... who know that deep down I love the strawberry Pez candy and also knows I haven't had any in years, and years, and years, and years? This is creepy.

So, on facebook, I posted about my mystery Pez sender and the different Pez dispensers I've received. It was a lot of fun, but very strange, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out who was sending these to me. I knew it was from Ebay, because all of the boxes had an ebay insignia on it.

Other than that... no idea.

A good friend of mine suggested that maybe the person would send me something everyday until my birthday and then reveal themselves. It never occurred to me that my birthday was coming up. Then I thought that maybe it was her.

So, after a while, I started to run out of room on my kitchen counter and my husband started asking me,"So what's with the Pez? Why are you buying Pez dispensers?" And I could honestly say that it wasn't me. He finally told me to quit buying things off the internet while on Ambien. That was funny enough I giggled pretty hard.

While looking on facebook one day, I noticed a friend of mine post a reference to Pez. So...I started thinking...could it be?

And yes, on my birthday, they came over with a box wrapped full of more Pez dispensers and admitted their guilt in the "ebay stalking".

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, kids of all ages.....drum roll please.... (and this does call for capslock) THE MYSTERY PEZ DISPENSER HAS BEEN REVEALED...IT IS....Darren (and I am not sure how much his daughter, but I'll give her credit) and Rowan Lamb. You may remember Darren as the Buddhist Monk who married Matt and I? A good friend who I have enjoyed getting to know better and have enjoyed getting to know his daughter. What a blessing you two are to have as friends! Thanks guys!!

So, in the end, this is my Pez inventory (and if my computer hadn't hit the crapper with a big chocolate bunny, I'd post pictures. As it stands, I'll have to do that later.):

1- Giant Garfield dispenser
1- Giant plush elephant dispenser with giant toy pez candy inside
1- Giant Darth Vader dispenser (by far the coolest!!!)
1- mini elephant key chain dispenser
1- whistle dispenser
3- watermelon head dispensers
1- apple head dispenser
1- grape head dispenser
1- bee head from Bug's Life dispenser
2- Jungle Mission Survival Kit dispensers (one purple, one orange)
1- Maggie Simpson dispenser
1- Tasmanian Devil dispenser
2- Daffy Duck dispensers
1- Tweety Bird dispenser
1- Pluto dispenser
1- Donald Duck dispenser
2- Mickey Mouse dispensers (the Donald and one of the Micky's are very old, antique pez, if you will)
1- Tigger dispenser
1- Elmo dispenser
1- Bert dispenser
1- Ernie dispenser
3- Gonzo dispensers
5- various bug dispensers
1- Lightning McQueen dispenser
1- Buzz Lightyear dispenser
1- Woody dispenser
2- Baby Jack Incredible dispensers
1- Fiona from Shrek dispenser
2- Puss in Boots dispensers
1- Snowman dispenser
4- Elf dispensers
3- Santa Claus dispensers
3- Reindeer dispensers
1- Wolverine dispenser
2- Batman dispenser
1- Harvey Twoface dispenser
1- Spiderman dispenser
2- Incredible Hulk dispensers
1- brown fuzzy bear dispenser
1- panda fuzzy bear dispenser
3- various Garfield dispensers
4- Barney Rubble dispensers
1- Ewok dispenser
2- X-wing pilot dispensers
2- Boba Fett dispensers
2- Chewbacca dispensers
2- Darth Vader dispensers
2- Yoda dispensers
3- C3PO dispensers
2- Princess Leia dispensers
Have I mentioned that I love Star Wars?
And the Grand Finale...
13- Imperial Stormtrooper dispensers (I am pretty sure they are all 501st Legion) ((ya, I'm a nerd))

Grand Total...

98 Freaking dispensers!! Do you know how much candy that is?!?!


Well, there could actually be 100, I did the math on NyQuil AND I need to do a thorough check to make sure I find all the ones Linus got to first.